Our one hundredth day of school will take place this Thursday. One hundred days. Sometimes it feels like no time at all has passed. Sometimes... not.
Most of my life, the passage of time during a school year was marked by changes in weather conditions and the concurring need for wardrobe adjustments. Sandals and short sleeves were replaced by jackets and closed-toe shoes were replaced by coats and scarves were replaced with the reappearance of skirts and shorts and everything Spring. In this land of eternal summer, though, everything seems a constant blur of progressing time. The colors don’t change the way they ought to. And there are certainly days when time seems to stand still and simply watch you wither. January hasn’t exactly been kind. The days of groaning and grumbling are here. Even now as I’m writing this, I feel I’ve written these words before. It’s a thought that’s ever-present - a constant reminder of the ritual cycles in my life. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Weekend, Monday again, etc. First period, second, third, etc. Freshman, sophomore, junior, senior. Teach, prepare, teach, meeting, teach, prepare, teach, etc. It’s exhausting somehow.
I realize that I sound completely glass-half-empty right now. It really isn’t all that bad. 2010 has already had some highlights- namely the visit of an old friend, Lauren from my Miami days. We had plenty of Kenyan adventures, including an incredible, restful safari in Shaba, Samburu, and Buffalo Springs at Joy’s Camp, a pretty swanky tented camp run by our friend Brenton’s safari company. Boy, it really helps to have an insider connection. We stayed at a five-star resort for half of what the usual price for accommodations would have been, took several game drives and even had a sun-downer atop a nearby hill, and ate and ate and ate. I don’t think it’s possible that I’ll ever tire of the safari experience. Later into Lauren’s visit, we also hiked the gorge at Hell’s Gate, and roamed Crescent Island in Naivasha, running into a day-old baby twiga (my favorite Swahili word- “giraffe”). It’s so good to have some time to get outside of Nairobi and fall in love with Kenya again.
And there is plenty to look forward to at school. My second-year theatre students are performing two separate, small-cast productions this year, The Complete Works of William Shakespeare, Abridged, and Steel Magnolias (a personal favorite from my own high school acting days). My first AP class will sit their exam in early May (praise the Lord they’re a brilliant bunch...takes the pressure off a bit), and I’m able to breathe a bit now, having had my course syllabus approved by the College Board in December. The ACSI accreditation team will make a follow-up visit to check in on our grade 12 curriculum and programming, and our yearbook team should wrap production in April, with printing happening this year before the school year finishes up. And then there’s the enormous event at the end of it all: the graduation of our first senior class.
I’m sure that June will bring with it an incredible feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction, but I’ll admit that right now I’m dreading what’s to come between now and then. I remember what a train wreck I was last year, and somehow this year I’ve managed to find even more to do. It’ll be a miracle if I don’t finish this second year of teaching without suffering some sort of panic attack or episode of insanity.
Throughout it all, somehow, God’s good. Faithful. He’s consistently reminding me of the race I’m running and the work He wants to accomplish here. I’m an unworthy vessel, but I know I’m chosen. I finally finished Total Truth and I’ll be beginning something new for my ACSI Christian Educator Statement assignment. New things to learn, more ideas to chew on. The other day, I came across a partial-answer to one of the professional questions I’ve mused about here before.
How do I expose worldly thinking, incorporate Biblical truth, and develop critical thinkers in my teaching of English literature?
I stumbled upon a bit of correspondence between fellow English teachers in which one shared with the other her response to the overwhelming presence of Deconstruction and Reader Response criticism in literature. These are two popular critical approaches with which I’m quite familiar, and which I remember to be central in my methods courses as an undergrad. Deconstruction is an approach to literature which suggests that literary works do not yield fixed, single meanings, because language can never say exactly what we intend it to mean. It seeks to destabilize meaning by examining the gaps and ambiguities of the language of a text. In other words? A deconstructionist believes that there are no universal truths, and therefore we as readers shouldn’t look for them. Reader Response criticism is an approach to literature that focuses on the reader rather than the work itself, by attempting to describe what goes on in the reader's mind during the reading of a text. Hence, the consciousness of the reader produced by reading the work is the actual subject of reader-response criticism. These critics are not after a "correct" reading of the text or what the author presumably intended; instead, they are interested in the reader's individual experience with the text. Thus, there is no single definitive reading of a work, because readers create rather than discover absolute meanings in texts. In a nutshell? When looking for meaning and Truth, look no further than your own conscience and worldview. Nothing else matters.
Philosophical rambling done. Excuse me - I realize that very few people would even be interested in all of that, let alone desire to read it in what’s supposed to be a personal blog. That’s enough for now. So here’s the heart of what I’m hoping to bring into my teaching: I want to expose my students to the backwards thinking of the world. Thinking that encourages them to swallow whole the totally ridiculous notion that meaning, purpose, and truth are either unknowable, unimportant, or nonexistent. What lunacy. And how horrifying that an unassuming teacher of literature could pass along this worldview to her students without even knowing it. Furthermore, you know what happens when you apply these critical approaches to a reading of the Bible? Either a reader who comes away seeing the literary and rhetorical devices in a mere “sacred text” and finds no meaning, or else someone who closes God’s word and believes that its only value lies in their own interpretation of it and that no revelation of a universal “message” is necessary to appreciate or respond to it. Neither are context or Author intent. Dangerous, dangerous stuff.
So there’s my personal revelation for the month. I’m still figuring out what to do with everything that I feel God’s pressing on my mind and heart. Hard sometimes to make heads or tails of what to do with stuff like this. If nothing else, I’m learning that, at least in my own life, for me to be a good follower of Christ, I’ve got to see the world for what it is. Perhaps more importantly: I have got to see Christ for who He is. Anyone else feeling convicted lately of an apathetic spirit when it comes to getting cozy with the Lord? Or is that just me? He’s so gracious in at least offering me these moments in my professional life where I can connect with Him, when I’m doing so very little to seek Him out on my own. Time for change.
Perhaps that’s the key to surviving another chaotic semester. Sitting quietly, unstopping my ears, and seeking out Christ. Just might be.
Quote of the Week: "Miss Weiant? Are we still in boot camp?" - 10th grade class
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